Get used to it, kids

Today’s Washington Post relates how the "pressure-filled intense preparation for a high-achieving adulthood" is taking its toll on today’s teens, particularly in certain areas of town.

I hate to break it to these exhausted, overly caffeinated kids, but getting into a decent college is just the beginning. There’s that “high-achieving adulthood” thing to look forward to, including but not limited to:

• Working at a job that’s impressive enough that people won’t shun you at cocktail parties
• Keeping up your skills and network to remain competitive (so you can keep that job or seamlessly land a new one if needed without that awkward “between opportunities” phase)
• Giving back to the community through at least one worthy volunteer activity
• Maintaining a stylish and beautiful living environment
• Maintaining a stylish and beautiful, trans-fat and wrinkle-free appearance
• Keeping up with world affairs (yes, that’s 200+ nations across 6 continents) so you can converse in an erudite fashion
• Cultivating habits and hobbies to ensure you remain interesting and enviable, such as fluency in languages, running a marathon, making one's own artisanal cheese
• Always acknowledging birthdays, holidays and special occasions in a timely fashion with the right card, gift and social event, forsaking a caterer and preparing the quail canapés yourself for the latter
• Ensuring that your family remains as flawless and impeccable as you are. Yes, this includes young toddlers with a will of their own.

Imagine saying, “Forget it – I’m taking a year off and not impressing anyone but myself. For 365 days I will sleep when I want, eat when I want and spend the bulk of my time in a Barcolounger with the remote in one hand and a box of Twinkies in the other.”

But the dream of slack is not the American dream.