Best road trip food ever.

Three beignets in a sack atop a lump of powdered sugar. A praline. A muffuletta as large as my head. Fortunately my rental SUV is a roomy one, as soon my derriere will be as large as my carbon footprint.

Soundtrack of the road...

Now I know why truckers love their white crosses. Driving several hours a day has roughly the same mentally numbing effect as huffing a carton of airplane glue. In such circumstances, Grey's Anatomy sensitive man-rock (e.g. "Fray for Fighting") just won't cut it. Here's what kept me from careening into a ditch:

- The Politicks

- A CD compilation by Gypsy Eyes Records

- Rage Against the Machine, inexplicably emerging on the radio somewhere in Tennessee

- Flipping back and forth between crunk and Christian across the whole state of Mississippi and most of Alabama.

- All those cheesy guilty pleasures you can only hear on rural American radio: Journey, Wham!, Billy Squier, Rick Astley (Never gonna give. You. Up. Never gonna let you down...). And is it just my imagination, or is John Waite looking pretty hot in his duet with Allison Krauss? (Thanks to Motel 6 cable, I caught this new video in between The Deadliest Catch and Who Wants To Be a Pussycat/Coyote/Hairstylist)

Note to radio stations: Even though you are all owned by Clear Channel, please remember that variety remains the spice of life. Next time I'm doing a road trip, I'm declaring my vehicle a John Mellencamp/Beyonce/Akon-free zone unless you move "to the left, to the left" of your usual stack of CDs and mix it up a little. Thank you.

Beyond Beads...New Orleans Fashion





Liquor isn't the only vice that will drain your wallet in this city - exquisite sundresses, jewelry, hats and all sorts of modern Southern delicacies with a European twist can be found throughout. If that black draped Balenciaga blouse at United Apparel Liquidators had been my size, I'd have been $150 poorer yet not felt a twinge of pain. (We northerners need you, UAL - please open a Washington branch!)

(Does New Orleans style include include crocs? you might ask. Well, not exactly at the boutiques. Crocs are plentiful at the souvenir shops, displayed among the plastic dog poop, Elvis bobble heads and "I got Bourbon faced on shit street!" t-shirts.)

Help New Orleans rebuild. Support local merchants.

Because many businesses are not web-enabled, or are a uniquely in-person experience, you will have to visit. This is highly recommended.

- The master French Quarter directory
- Cafe Beignet , yumminess for dining in and take-out.
- New Orleans Tours Once you're dolled up and properly fed, explore and learn some history. The "Ghosts and Vampires" tour will creep you out...in a fun Bauhaus-meets-Ken-Burns kind of way, of course.

Now for pirates...arrrrrr!!!